IDS #256 - The Great Cinco De Mayo Couple's Quarrel Of 2025

Before we go live, I did want to talk. I have a political question for you personally

>> Mike: Before we go live, I did want to talk. I want to. I have a political question just for you personally.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Straws and hay.


Are we going to talk about straws tonight on the podcast, Mike

>> Darin: Are we going to talk about straws tonight on the podcast, Mike?

>> Mike: Well, have you noticed, you know, people in your, in your life that are, conservative?

>> Darin: I do.

>> Mike: Do they have a problem with straws?

>> Darin: Not like a political problem, as some try to make it.

>> Mike: Are they less. What is there a political thing for straws?

>> Darin: well, there's the people who hate that we went to paper straws because that's not how God creates.

>> Mike: God fearing, Christian plastic straws.

>> Darin: I know people who don't use straws just because they don't want to pollute. They don't want to keep throwing plastic away. And so when I go to a restaurant and I don't mind drinking out of a glass out of a restaurant, I assume it's clean. And if it's not clean, whatever. I'm going to die sometime.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: I like drinking my ice water out of a glass. Okay. Because I'm a man, it's hard to look like a badass.

>> Mike: So it's a man. Okay. That's what. It's a manly thing. No, I don't want to be the people. I know the people.

>> Darin: Yeah, that's right, the people. It's because I don't want to be sucking on a thing.

>> Mike: Hello.

>> Darin: The people I know who don't use straws do it because they don't want more plastic going into the environment. Okay. Why? What do you think?

>> Mike: I don't think that's why the people that I know don't use straws.

>> Darin: The people you know, why do they not use straws?

>> Mike: I don't know.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I was hoping.

>> Darin: Well, it's, a good thing you brought this up.

>> Mike: Yeah. So it's not a good podcast topic. I just didn't know if you. Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: Well, we're definitely not going to lead with it, I'll tell you that. Show Conan some respect. He's a comedy legend and you represent.

>> Mike: The lowest point of his 40 year career. Well, I, I don't think that's true.

>> Darin: Because he does a podcast now, but I mean, that's not really a low.

>> Mike: Point because everyone has a podcast now.


This is Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast

>> Dave: Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome. After we record this episode, we're all going out for ice cream. Please welcome your hosts, Mike and Darren.

>> Mike: Hey, I'm Mike.

>> Darin: I'm Darren.

>> Mike: You are listening to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast.

>> Darin: This is episode number 256.

>> Mike: We are stupid excited that you're here.

>> Darin: I'm glad you.

>> Mike: There's more to that.

>> Darin: I'm glad you finished that.

>> Mike: Stupid.

>> Darin: We are stupid Stupid.

>> Mike: Yeah. Oh, right.

>> Darin: To call you stupid would be an.

>> Mike: Insult to stupid people.

>> Darin: Welcome to the show.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: We are coming off a high. Lord have mercy. Mike had a birthday party over the weekend.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: His birthday is not till this Thursday. So you still have. Well, no, because this episode drops four days after.

>> Mike: He's gonna be an old man.

>> Darin: you know what? If you want to send Mike something, you can do that. You can always do that. He doesn't care.

>> Mike: I don't care.

>> Darin: But Mike, my little brother Mike had his 50th birthday party, and, boy, howdy, was it a hoot.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, Lord, we're gonna talk about that.

>> Darin: My face hurts from laughing. My sides hurt from laughing. I ate so much bad food, I got acid reflux. Hence a hangover. Yeah. Because I'm at that age where I can, eat too much food. I get a hangover from greasy, food. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I had a little. A few, drinks.

>> Mike: drinky drinks.

>> Darin: Yeah, I had some drinky drinks.

>> Mike: You go beer, or were you going.

>> Darin: Like, I only drink the beer. I don't do the hardcore drinks.

>> Mike: Were you doing those, like, just because part of the thing was we were going to these fancy beer places.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: One of them had lights hanging from the craft beer. Craft beer, as they say.

>> Darin: Yeah. Like craft cheese.

>> Mike: Yeah. One of them had lights hanging from the ceiling.

>> Darin: I know.

>> Mike: And a painting of a green monster's ass on the wall and stood above.

>> Darin: It looking down with these big red eyes. Oh, it was so scary.

>> Mike: And I yelled. I said, what do you want from us, monster?

>> Darin: And the monster bent down and said, I need about 350. Yes. That's.

>> Mike: I think it was my favorite one.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: then another one was, very bright and looked like, a lot like another bar that Dan. So my friend. Our friend. Yes, Dan Aylward, was at this, point. Was at this shindig, and whoopty woo. Whoopty woo. There was another time that he visited Cincinnati and took me to a bar that looked just like that. So.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: My inebriated, ass kept going up to him and asking him if this was that bar.

>> Darin: Is this where we were?

>> Mike: And Dan is nothing if not patient. And he said, no, that's true. No, this is not that bar.

>> Darin: He has the patience of a saint.

>> Mike: He said, the other bar is bigger. Huh? But this bar is smaller. And Dan is gracious.

>> Darin: Wait, hold on. Hold it. So that bar was bigger? The one you guys were in was smaller.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay, good to know.

>> Mike: Yeah.


Dan had a surprise party for a friend of the show in Cincinnati

There's two sides to that coin. And then he. And then he added. He added. Because he's a nice man.

>> Darin: He is. He's very nice.

>> Mike: He added. I can see why you would think it's the same, though. And then we left that conversation on good terms. And then later, I went to the bathroom and I saw him coming the other way, and I said, is this the same bar that we went to in a thing? And he looked at me with concern.

>> Darin: Are you sure this is.

>> Mike: No, it's not the same bar.

>> Mike: And, I quit asking after that.

>> Darin: No. So, how am I.

>> Mike: At least I think that was. Dan.

>> Darin: We started the party like we were in a third world country. We rode what's referred to as the pedal wagon.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: The paddle wagon. To pedal and not the paddy wagon. That's like in the forties when they would. When they would hit you with the billy club, the police, and the. They'd throw you in the back of the patty wagon and take you to the. The Gray Bar Hotel.

>> Mike: Yeah. Can I.

>> Darin: Let me.

>> Mike: Let me. Let me start this story from my perspective. Okay, sure. So I had gone to.

>> Darin: My perspective was fine. No, no, no, no. We'll start. That's fine.

>> Mike: I had gone to a, another surprise party. A surprise. A literal surprise party for a friend of the show, Fancher.

>> Darin: Not a figurative, literal.

>> Mike: He had no idea what was going on and scared the bejesus out of him and had a. Had a great time. and then I told Bess, I was like, I kind of want a surprise party. And it's like, well, you can't have a surprise. You can't plan.

>> Darin: You can't say, I want a surprise party. Yeah.

>> Mike: So she took that and she ran with it. She said, I'm not going to surprise you with the party. She's going to surprise me with what we do at the party.

>> Darin: Right.

>> Mike: And so I was, Fancher, and his family took me to everybody's records.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And we walked around looking at record store stuff.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Whilst, preparations were being made. And then I was brought to said place, to the hotel. And then, Boy, we should have just kept going from your perspective, because this is boring, as.

>> Darin: If you weren't here earlier. it was much like a third world country. And that there was how many? 16 people. Yeah, I think 16 people on this pedal wagon. This giant. It looks like a Bus. Right.

>> Mike: But you have to pedal it.

>> Darin: But everybody has to pedal it. Like, ah. We have, like, bicycle. Right. And okay, so we're downtown Cincinnati, and it's not like we're in San Francisco.

>> Mike: And you can drink while you're on this thing.

>> Darin: You can. Yeah.

>> Mike: It's exercising plus drinking, so.

>> Darin: Because that's what everybody wants to do. It's like they're on a bike and like, God, I want a beer.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: And go bicycling at the same time. so it was fun. And we get on this pedal wagon.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And we're going, from,

>> Mike: We were across Baltic street up to.

>> Darin: Roundhouse across from the Brew Dog.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And we made it up to, what I refer to as bar number one.

>> Darin: Because I don't remember the name of any of these bars, like, except for the.


Sean Taylor: The quality of friends who came to your party was amazing

The second one.

>> Mike: Yeah. Bar number one was dark with lights hanging from the ceiling and a green monster's ass painted on the wall.

>> Darin: And the only thing that I really care about at a bar is, they have beer. And they did. So I was happy. And I got a beer. And my wife, Libby, she got a BlackBerry cider.

>> Mike: Whoa.

>> Darin: Holy crap.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Dave: This.

>> Darin: Yeah, BlackBerry cider was good. It was really, really good. So we were enjoying our drinks, and I'm catching up with, They're my friends now also, but I'm catching up with Mike's.

>> Mike: That's what he thinks.

>> Darin: They seem to like me.

>> Mike: You're in the crew years.

>> Darin: I tagged along with Mike and three of his college buddies to go see the U2s in Louisville. There's Matt Box, Jim Fancher, Dan Elard, Mike Odle, and myself. Right. So I met these three guys, these three friends that Mike has known forever. And within five minutes, I felt like I've known these guys forever. Right. I instantly connected with these guys, and I had a blast with them. And since then, I've seen Dan twice. I've seen Fanch when we went to see the Metallicas, and then I saw Box when we went to see, Mr. Floyd of the former lead singer of Pink Floyd.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Roger Waters.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: Yeah. So I'm catching up with these guys having a blast. We went to that bar. We went to a second bar. They dropped us off at the second location. We had a choice, of bars. And your brother in law, Jim Boyce, was hysterical because one of the options was this place, this bar called Pins that had pinball. And he reminded me of the little kid in a Christmas store. And he's like, but Mike, they've got pinball. He wanted to go play pinball so bad.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So we're like, okay. So because of.

>> Mike: Is that the one we went to?

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: So they had pinball machines there.

>> Darin: Yeah. I did not know that it was downstairs.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: I was upstairs talking to you. Yeah. And Tay and box and other. And laughing my ass off at these stupid people.

>> Mike: By the way, Tay flew in from New Hampshire for this party. I haven't seen Tay in forever.

>> Darin: Good guy.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah. So you have talked about Tay multiple times. This guy, he walks up to me, goes, you must be Darren. To which I said, I must be. And I said, yeah. And and what might your name be? And he says, I'm Sean. I'm like, well, nice to meet you, Sean. And then like 10, I don't know, 15 minutes later, I hear somebody mumbling, I can't believe Tay came down here for this.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And I said, who's Tay? And they pointed. I'm like, that guy. That's Sean.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Oh no, it's Sean Taylor. Oh, okay. So anyway, he. I don't know if that's his real name or not. Anyway, cool guy. We had so much fun. And. And I'm gonna. I'm just gonna say you are one lucky son of a. I am. Because my God, the, the caliber. The quality of friends who came to your party. These guys and, and gals, they're well paid. Did. I'm. I don't know. Cuz I've got to start paying my friends to show up and acting more like, your buddies. Cuz your friends are top notch, man.

>> Mike: Awesome. Thank you.


You had an awesome time at your 50th birthday party

>> Darin: You had an awesome time. So much fun at this, at this 50th birthday party. And I was trying so hard not to be jealous because my 50th birthday party fell in 2020. Do you remember 2020?

>> Mike: Yeah, there was a little, around there. Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah. We had Covid going on. So I wasn't able to have my 50th big ass whoopty woo. We had a party on my 51st and it was fun. It was a good time. It was a really good time. And I wasn't disappointed at all in it. but I'm very happy for you that you got to have your 50th birthday party.

>> Mike: Can I complain about. Can I complain about a few.

>> Darin: Sure, why not?

>> Mike: If I may. So there were people yelling for you two to be played.

>> Mike: And I was like, I kind of. I mean, can we, can we not you know what I mean? I recognize why.

>> Darin: Yeah, you know, because it's your thing.

>> Mike: But at that point I'm like, can we. Let's just. And so. But we did get Van Halen. And then I don't know what the hell was in the. In the middle. We got what a millennial thinks boomers want to hear. That's how we got the. And you were rocking out.

>> Darin: We had your love by the Outfield, Van Halen jump. There was. I can't remember the other song in.

>> Mike: The middle, but we ended on Spirit of Radio. That's right. But that was, that was. I did request that one.

>> Darin: Well before that though was Country Roads by John Denver.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: My God, everybody lost their frickin mind.

>> Mike: There's a bunch of West Virginia over.

>> Darin: Over. John Denver.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So I went into my telephone and I found a photo of me when I was a child. My personal digital assistant. Yes. I found this photo of me as a child with the bangs and the big glasses and the. And the big collars. And I was showing it to everybody. I was like, see, I used to look just like John Denver's kid. Blown away. Everyone was blown away. And we went to that bar and there was that chick, the bartender, she had more tattoos than, you have ages or years on you. And I was like, hey, didn't I look like John Denver? And she says, yeah. She has no idea, no idea who John Denver is.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: But yeah, she was impressed. I don't know. She wanted a chip. I don't know. I don't know. But good times.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Good party.

>> Mike: Glad you came. Glad you could make it.

>> Darin: I wouldn't have missed it for the world.


This portion of the show is brought to you by the Taco Bar Calculator

>> Dave: This portion of our show is brought to you by the Taco Bar Calculator. Hi, I'm Dave Lay and I love tacos. And I also love to throw taco parties. I don't mean to brag, but the little wife and I have quite a few friends and we used to have a problem figuring out how many ingredients to buy when throwing a taco party. That was until we discovered the taco bar calculator. Let me tell you how this works. All you gotta do is type in how many people are coming to the party. And the taco bar calculator does the work for you. It tells you how many pounds of meat, how many heads of lettuce, how many jars of salsa, how many boxes of taco shells, how many bags of cheese, how many ounces of sour cream. I think you get the idea. The taco bar calculator available on the Internet. Just go to Google, Yahoo, or Bing, and type in taco bar Calculator.


Bess wanted to go to a Mexican restaurant for Cinco de Mayo

Now back to the show.

>> Darin: Foreign.

>> Mike: yesterday was Cinco de Mayo.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: That's the 5th of May for our Canadian.

>> Darin: Happy Cinco de Mayo to all who celebrate.

>> Mike: So Bess wanted to go to a Mexican restaurant. And you can't go more. You can't walk more than five feet in this area without walking into a Mexican restaurant. It's driving me nuts.

>> Darin: That's true.

>> Mike: They changed, Bag or Dave's by the theater. Now, as a Mexican restaurant.

>> Darin: What?

>> Mike: You've already got, like, two or three of them in that area. Anyway, I digress. So we went to this Mexican restaurant. We sit outside in this. Inside, it was packed. People were screaming, running around, and there was a dude in a Transformer costume walking around. I don't know why. Yeah, but apparently that's a thing. Not only at that Mexican restaurant, but at another one that Bess took Andrew to, there was a robot walking around. So that's. I don't know. The. The Transformers. Apparently, after the war was over, me, they went into the public sector, and they started working Mexican, restaurants. Anyway, resistance is futile. So we sat outside, and there was nobody outside.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: But then as time went on, more and more people started sitting outside.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: As normally happens, the loud couple that I want to watch is sitting behind me, and. And Bess is watching them because she's sitting across from me, right? And I hear this, lady say, it is too cold out here. It is too cold to be sitting outside. And then there's some silence. And I can't hear. Now, Bess, at this point, is not listening to a damn word that I'm saying. Her eyes are locked behind me. And then a little bit more. Is this all that's on the menu? This is all they have. Where's the rest of the food?

>> Darin: What all? And then what all do you want? There's nachos.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: There's a burrito. There's a taco.

>> Mike: Like, we've been out here forever, and they're not coming around to take our drink order. There's just not. And then the guy, you know, came out. and it. They only have Pepsi products, okay? They told her that. So she ordered whatever went back in. I wanted a Diet Coke. I can't get a Diet Coke. It's just everything. And then finally the guy, and he was about this loud, you know, I'm tired of your God. And he left. No, he left her at the table. He went inside the restaurant. I thought he left, period. So I almost choked.

>> Darin: Yes.

>> Mike: I almost. I wanted to turn around so bad. Bess was, you know, just. Her eyes were wide. A few minutes later, he came back. Came back and sat down. And I did get a couple looks at him before I left, but I wanted to high five the dude. What a bro. And I've just. I just. I asked mess. It's like, would you be able to just go back to your meal if you were talking to me at a restaurant? And I just. That loud. Said, I'm tired of your. And walked out and then came back. Would you be able to. Because they just were just going about their dinner like nothing had happened. Like, that's just. That's just a Monday night.

>> Darin: What happened?

>> Mike: She didn't say anything back to it. I didn't hear her voice. He did. It did its job. She didn't say the rest of the night. Uh-huh. It was amazing.


Irritable Dad Syndrome is Cincinnati's comedy podcast

>> Darin: That's awesome. I would buy his dinner.

>> Mike: So. Great.

>> Darin: Would you like to sit with us? Good for him. Oh, I'm tired of dirty.

>> Mike: It made my Cinco de Mayo.

>> Darin: that's. Yeah, that's perfect.

>> Dave: You're listening to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast.

>> Darin: No offense, but Burning Hell. I think Libby and I are addicted to turlets.

>> Mike: we.

>> Darin: We went to the Home Depot, and we're doing some remodeling at the house. We're not doing the remodeling. We've hired someone to come and do remodeling. So more stories are coming henceforth on Irritable Dad Syndrome. We're having our bathroom remodeled. And, we're getting a new deck, and the house is going to look like a wonderland.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: It's gonna look amazing when it's done. So, we were at the Home Depot, and we're looking at. We're, on the. The turlet aisle, and this guy comes up. He's about 5ft tall, and he's. Can I help you? And I said, yeah, we're looking for the turlets. He goes right this way. And he turns and he starts walking. Doesn't ask me what. He goes right this way. And then he stops. He says, I don't want to get in your business.


Have you thought about getting the extra tall toilet? Extra tall

All right, but let me ask you a question. Have you thought about getting the elongated bowl? I said, yeah, we have thought about getting the elongated bowl. Have you thought about getting the extra tall toilet?

>> Mike: Extra tall?

>> Darin: Extra tall. You can get one that's 19 inches, high instead of 17 inches. To which Libby said, well, I would like to get one, but my husband, if he gets. If he sits on one, his feet are going to dangle.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Scared of heights because I'm so short.

>> Mike: Yeah. Okay, okay, okay.

>> Darin: Because.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And I'm like, I'm a little shorter than you, Libby. And we almost had. We almost, you know, went, you're shorter than Libby by a little bit. She keeps calling me short. And I'm like, I'm average height. I am not.

>> Mike: That's all I'm going to be able to see the next time I see you guys. I've never. I've never noticed that.

>> Darin: Yeah, You've never noticed that I'm shorter than Libby?

>> Mike: Yeah, no, yeah, I am.

>> Darin: I am totally shorter than Libby by a little. Anyway, so.

>> Mike: So when I call her Libzilla. Liberal. Okay?

>> Darin: Libzilla.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I don't advise that.


Paul asks if we're considering buying an extra tall toilet

So Paul asks if we're considering buying a tall. An extra tall toilet. And I said yes. And Libby said, yes. And so he's showing me this model and then he just absolutely cracks up. He said, last week this gentleman came in here and he had three ladies with him. I don't know what he looked like. I wasn't looking at him. He was looking at the lady.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: And he asked me, where can I buy the balls that you put into this toilet? Because the one that you flush.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: the golf balls.

>> Mike: Uh-huh, yeah.

>> Darin: And he looks at me like, guys nuts. And I said, paul, do you do stand up when you're not working at Home Depot? No, I don't. Anyway, he's 81.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: Because I chatted him up and sitting there talking for 10 minutes while Libby went and looked at new tiles and stuff like that.

>> Darin: But yeah, we bought another turlet.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: That we're going to have installed here soon. And then Libby told me that she wants to replace the other turlet in our house.

>> Mike: Okay, so why are you replacing the turlets?

>> Darin: Because they're. How old is the house? It's like we've replaced two of them. You might as well just. You know what? You might as well just go all in.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: And just replace all of them, I guess.

>> Mike: Yeah. So, yeah, after a while you want to. Something new.

>> Darin: That's right. It's exactly.


The president of Our company came to the TV station where I work

>> Dave: It's time for a classic clip from Irritable dad syndrome.

>> Darin: I had a Superman moment at work.

>> Mike: You ran down the hallway, ripped your shirt open. Nope.

>> Darin: I wish.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: The president of Our company came to the TV station where I work. Okay. The guy who is the president of the company that owns our TV station, his office is in New York.

>> Mike: Oh, okay.

>> Darin: He's visiting all the stations.

>> Mike: The head honcho, the big wig, the big cheese. The big cheese.

>> Darin: Yeah, yeah, the man. He's coming to our TV station to meet people and they're like, everybody, you know, clean up your offices and. And, he's. He's coming and, you know, he's going to talk to us and if, you have any questions. So he's having a, A big meeting inside our studio.

>> Mike: What do you. What questions? What do you. How's it. Oh, my God.

>> Darin: People had a ton of.

>> Mike: Really?

>> Darin: Yeah. People had a ton of questions, okay? And he answered every single one of them. He's a very intelligent guy. Okay? Yeah. So it's not every day the president of the company comes to the TV station. Yeah. Now, I never tuck in my shirt, okay? My shirt's untucked. I wear jeans. I don't wear ratty jeans.

>> Mike: My shirts are always tucking your shirt. Because you never wear a belt. You have to wear a belt.

>> Darin: We're not talking about the belt now, okay? We're not doing that Now. I never tuck in my shirt. My shirt's always ironed, okay? I wear a shirt with a button down collar. It's nice and neat. I usually always wear dress, shoes, nice socks. Anyway, so the president of the company is coming in. I tucked, in my shirt. I wore khakis, Okay. I wore nice dress shoes. I wore a belt. You'd be happy to know you did wear a belt. I did wear a belt. So I'm standing in the studio and I'm waiting for the president of the company to talk to us. And my boss, Julie, she looks at me, goes, oh, hey, Darren, how's it going? I said, good, good, good. Janet, who's standing right next to Julie, doesn't know that I'm Darren. She goes, oh, my God, I didn't recognize you. I'm like, it's, you know, Superman puts on his glasses.

>> Mike: He's Clark Kent.

>> Darin: He takes off the glasses, it's Superman. Where did Clark Kent go?

>> Mike: Yeah, you wear a belt and now.

>> Darin: You'Re not tuck in my shirt. She doesn't recognize me. I've worked with Janet for 11 years. Years.

>> Mike: This is like a superpower you have.

>> Darin: Now listen, there's four, maybe five guys at the station who have a completely shaved head. One of them is the general manager of our station.

>> Mike: Okay?

>> Darin: I ain't him. He's standing up front next to the president of our company. another guy is a, videographer named John. I'm easily 6 inches taller than him.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: and then the other guy's black. He's our chief meteorologist.


Darren: Chick Fil a screwed up my name a different way

>> Dave: It's time now for the Chick Fil a story of the week.

>> Darin: Chick Fil a screwed up my name a different way.

>> Darin: Yeah. I have never. So excited. Okay, so let me back up. The last couple of times I've went to Culver's with, my son Cameron works at Culver's now. The last couple times I went there to pick him up. If I've ordered food, they have spelled it D a R R o N. Daron. Daron.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Chick fil a said, hold my beer. I, went with my mom to Chick Fil a the other day and they said, what's a good name for the order? What's a good name for the order? Well, my name is a perfect name to put since I'm the one who's going to be paying and then eventually eating it. But my name is Darren. And I said, okay. And I could see them. I saw that they put in six digits.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: I saw that they misspelled my name. So the guy comes out with my food and he says, danren.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Dan Wren. Dan Wren.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: D a n. R e N. I wanted to give him a hug.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: It's not a hard name.

>> Mike: So my new thing and m. My new thing at the chicken fillet is pre ordering. If you. You done that.

>> Darin: I have not app.

>> Mike: I'm never ordering in any other way. You don't have to talk to anybody.

>> Darin: Oh, wow.

>> Mike: And I also pre order at the, the Dunkin Donuts in the morning. I just put my coffee order in. You can shoot past the. The where they talk to you. Uhhuh. Uh-huh. Like a bat out of hell. Which pisses people off in the morning. Just. And they're practically. They see you coming and they like, hold it out and you can grab it. You don't have to stop.

>> Darin: So they see you coming and they hold it out. Yeah, okay.

>> Mike: Yeah. But at the chicken fillet, they ask you if you want to add or change anything in the order. And I'm like, no, just give me my stuff. And then they waive you. So I don't know which chicken fillet you go to, but the one I go to, it gets really competitive of, between the right and left people. Who's going right Right.

>> Darin: And no, there wasn't any internal, fighting going on.

>> Mike: They've got. This is the one where they have, like, 15 people out there taking your order. And you've got the one dude I call the halt guy guy, and he just. He stands in front of the car that's not supposed to go. And he holds his hand up, right? And I'm waiting for him to yell out, halt. He doesn't. He has not halted me since I've done a mobile order. He doesn't. He sees the car, he looks down, and I get one of these, audio podcast. But I get one of the. Like. Like, come on.

>> Darin: Waving me in, waving me in, waving me.

>> Mike: And I roll in. They know who I am. They practically throw it in the window.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: And I'm out of there. Jack. I ain't got time to be screwing around with those people. There's no name or anything.

>> Darin: Yeah, I might have to try that. Yeah. But if I don't do that, then I won't have people misspell my name and then I won't have any stories for this podcast because we're already. We're 20 minutes into it. We're almost done.

>> Mike: Sometimes you got to have a short one. Hello? People got to do, Right.

>> Darin: That's true.

>> Mike: They don't have time to be listening to our dumb asses.

>> Darin: No, no, they do.

>> Mike: This is a warning. If you mow your grass when you listen to this show.

>> Darin: Oh, this is the perfect podcast. Listen to while you're mowing.

>> Mike: Yeah, this is going to be one of those that ends early.


One man asks me if my father was a drummer

Pick it up, pick up the pace. If you're in a riding mower, go up a gear. If you're pushing, you need to start breaking a sweat because we're going to be done and you're going to still have some more rows.

>> Darin: That's true. That is true.

>> Dave: This has been the Chick Fil A story of the week.

>> Darin: We voted before this episode. I'm wearing my Metallica Master of Puppet shirt.

>> Mike: I'm wearing still panther.

>> Darin: I got to the school where we vote, and ain't nobody in there. No, there's nobody there. There's a lady there who's handing out the stickers, which, by the way, if you really want to get a funky look, don't take a sticker.

>> Mike: We didn't.

>> Darin: Would you like a sticker? And you go, no, thanks. They look at you like you're.

>> Mike: That's. That's what? Yeah.

>> Darin: You're not going to take a sticker. Why don't you want to.

>> Mike: Our neighbor was one of the poll workers in there, too.

>> Darin: Oh, really?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Okay. Anyway, so I go up and there's. Like, I said, the place is empty, but there are six gentleman there to take my, information.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And so I was like, which one of you wants me? So I go in, I give the guy my ID and he's checking, and he asks me to verify my address. And one guy looks at my shirt, and he says, are you a musician? And I said, well, yes. I play drums. Oh, you play drums, huh? I said, yeah, yeah, I like. I like the drums. Then I said, He says, is that something that. That you got from your, That you brought, you know, from your family? I'm like, no, my. My father had no musical talent at all. He liked bluegrass music.

>> Mike: The hell you're having this conversation in the.

>> Darin: It's like, okay. It's nice that he's asking me questions, but it's also weird that he's asking me questions like, was your father a drummer? No, dad wasn't a drummer at all. Dad didn't know how to play,

>> Mike: Anything in this area. If you show any. If you're interested in anything other than corn, guns, or Mexican food out of state fireworks. Yeah. Yeah. Then, ah, what the hell's wrong with you?

>> Darin: But, yeah, that one guy's asking me if my. If I play drums, if my father was a drummer. And I said, no. Then a second dude asks, anybody else in your family play drums? Yeah, my son plays drums. And, we were thinking of soundproofing the downstairs, but then, you know, my wife doesn't mind.

>> Mike: Start looking over your shoulder for the agents coming up behind you with zip ties in the black bag.

>> Darin: Are they stupid, stalling because the voting machines don't work? Yeah, because he asks me if anybody else in the family plays drums, which I said. My son. A third person says, So is he like, Neil Peart? I said, no, not yet. He's not that good. A, fourth person says, what about Stuart Copeland?

>> Mike: What the hell?

>> Darin: No, he's. He's not as good as Stuart.

>> Mike: You know, I know what some of what it's like.

>> Darin: I tell you. Hey, my son plays guitar. Is he Van Halen?

>> Mike: We left right after you because you stalked us there, and we. So we left right after you, and the lady asked us if we wanted a sticker, and I said, no, I've had about enough stickers.

>> Darin: I'm trying to quit.

>> Mike: She said, well, we, somebody needs to take them. She's like, there's just. I mean, there's hardly anybody came out to vote in the first place. And I felt bad. So that might be.

>> Darin: Got this surplus of I voted stickers.

>> Mike: There was an ass load of I voted stickers there.

>> Darin: Reuse them next November. They don't change, they don't expire.

>> Mike: The only person I was going to see is you. You know, I voted. You were there. And my. Our dogs can't read, so they don't know what the hell they mean. But my point is, is they didn't have anyone to talk to all day because nobody voted.

>> Darin: Right.


Irritable Dad Syndrome is brought to you by zipper lube

>> Mike: So then you walk in with this shirt that clearly identifies you as a drummer.

>> Darin: Yeah, I know. Guy wearing a Metallica shirt. Yeah. The first guy asked if I'm a musician. Second person asked if my son was a musician. One guy asked if my father was a musician.

>> Mike: Did you tell him about the podcast?

>> Darin: Trying to get out of there. What? Dude asks if my son is as good as Neil Peart. A second guy, a fifth guy asked if my son is as good as Stuart, Copeland. And then the lady said, what about Lars Orange?

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: They were like a person.

>> Mike: If I were there, I would say, what about.

>> Darin: Clearly so sick of each other.

>> Mike: Max Weinberg. Because he had.

>> Darin: I've met Max Weinberg.

>> Mike: He had a whole crew with him.

>> Dave: This portion of Irritable Dad Syndrome is brought to you by zipper lube. Are you tired of wasting hours of your precious time futzing around trying to open and close sticky zippers? Well, have a seat, Tony. I have a product for you. Just rub some zipper lube across that annoying zipper and your problems will magically disappear. Easy up, easy down, easy all around Zipper lube. Available wherever quality zipper related products are sold.


Mike and Derek: Doomsday is going to have the Thunderbolts

Now back to you, Mike and Derek.

>> Darin: Did you see the Thunderbolts?

>> Mike: Not yet. Okay, I hear it's the New Avengers.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: I hear it's the bomb.

>> Darin: I'm telling you right now, Marvel is back.

>> Mike: Uhhuh. Uh-huh.

>> Darin: They are back. It was so much fun. Libby and I were cackling at Red Guardian. David harbor is a national treasure.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: I don't know why. Yelena. Florence Pew. Florence Pew. Pew. Oh, Jesus, I'm sorry. You know how you can't stop going? I can't stop going. Pew for Pew has top billing in this.

>> Mike: Uh-huh.

>> Darin: And I don't have anything against Florence Pugh Pew. Okay, But David Harbour steals the show.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: He, as the Red Guardian, is just money in the bank. And I would watch him all day long. It was Funny. It was action packed. It was exciting and we loved it. And I cannot wait to see them return because they will return. I believe they're going to be in Doomsday. And we talked about this a couple of weeks ago. Doomsday is going to have the Thunderbolts, the Fantastic Four, the X Men, and then what's left of the old av.

>> Mike: Which X Men?

>> Darin: Patrick Stewart, who plays, Colonel Clink. No, no, no, he plays, Admiral. Admiral Akbar. He plays Admiral Akbar, yeah. And then Kelsey, Grammer as Beast.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: The dude with the one eye, that, that Cyclops. Cyclops. The, Mystique is going to be in Doomsday. And Wolverine.

>> Mike: no, that's the one dude, that's made to the Marvel side.

>> Darin: I predict that Wolverine and Deadpool, I predict that they're going to be surprise guests. That's my prediction.

>> Mike: You think Deadpool's going to like, hey, he's going to have the. On your left.

>> Darin: I predict they're going to show up unexpectedly because there's always a surprise. Always a surprise in the Marvel movies. But, yeah, they're back. Because I didn't care for Thor, Love and Thunder. I thought the Eternals was weird. I thought the second Strange was weird. It was. Okay. I was let down with Ant man, Quadrophenia. But this one was just. My God. This one was fun as hell. Okay. Yeah.

>> Mike: All right.

>> Darin: Go out see it right now.

>> Mike: Okay. All right.

>> Darin: Tell them what Darren Coxin you and they'll give you $5 off your popper.

>> Mike: Okay. We're gonna get sued.

>> Darin: At participating theaters.

>> Mike: There you go.

>> Darin: Thank you, Jesus. Void or prohibited by law.


David Harbour did Oscar the Grouch on Saturday Night Live

So after we saw the Thunderbolts, yeah, I asked Libby, I said, have you ever seen David Harbour when he did his Oscar the Grouch thing on Saturday Night Live? Have you ever seen.

>> Mike: No. No.

>> Darin: You haven't seen that either?

>> Mike: No.

>> Darin: They did Oscar the Grouch as an origin story. Okay. And they made it look like the movie Joker.

>> Mike: Okay.

>> Darin: It was seedy and just miserable, and dark and decrepit. They. Oh, my God, it was amazing. Go on the YouTubes and look up David Harbour.

>> Mike: Did they do it the same way they did, with Pedro Pascal? The Mario thing? M. it's a me.

>> Darin: Yes. They did it, like, not the Acropolis, not the, you know. Yeah, a dystopian world or whatever, but they made it look like the Joker movie. And here's David Harbour dancing on the steps and getting inside the trash can. And I'm, a Grouch. You know, Ernie gets killed. And Ernie. It's amazing. So I'm telling Libby about this, and she goes, well, you know, we're sitting there drinking our morning coffee, eating our breakfast, and she says, well, show it to me. So I get on the phone and I find it and we're watching it and nobody's in the house.

>> Mike: Right.

>> Darin: Okay. The both boys are gone.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: So we're watching it and then we hear. Or I thought I heard. Was that a bang on the door? That couldn't have been. Or was that a bang on the door or was that something on the phone? And then I heard another. Was that. Was somebody banging on the door? I wasn't sure.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: The next thing I know was I think someone has opened our door. Jacob's gone, Cameron's gone. Then the door shuts.

>> Mike: Okay. It's a Kris Michael.

>> Darin: And I'm still thinking, did somebody open the door or not? My question is, what the hell? I should probably check in case someone's trying to rob or murder us.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And. Yeah. And so I ran out and here's Jacob getting back into his car as a. Jacob, did you just come back in the house? Oh, yeah, Dad, I forgot something. I'm like, give me a heads up. Hey, dad, I'm here. To which Libby said, did you notice that, like, a potential killer walked into our house and we just kept watching the phone?

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: That's how good the SNL skit was. Just kept watching it.


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>> Dave: This portion of Irritable Dad Syndrome is brought to you by Trim fingernail clippers. Since 1947, the Trim brand has provided quality clippers to help make your fingernails look their absolute best. Oh, and here's a fun fact. Did you know that the Trim brand was founded in Shelton, Connecticut? It's true. Just one more reason to visit the Show Me state. Or is it the nutmeg state? It doesn't matter.


The Kentucky Derby happened last weekend, and it had a horse

Now back to the show.

>> Darin: The Kentucky Derby, was, last, a couple days ago, and, I don't know who won the Kentucky Derby.

>> Mike: A horse?

>> Darin: yes.

>> Mike: It's always horse with a person.

>> Darin: Exactly. A horse is a horse. Of course. Of course. So the Kentucky Derby happened, and it had a horse. And I said on Facebook, hear me out. The Kentucky Derby. Except how about they run two laps? Right?

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Which I thought was a decent idea until my friend Craig Augustine, who's been a guest on this show, jumped in with the brilliant idea that they have to have a pit stop. Stop and replace all four horseshoes. Then another Friend of mine said that half the horses run clockwise and the other half of horses run counterclockwise.

>> Mike: Oh. Give the jockeys lances. Okay, that's. Can we do that?

>> Darin: Yeah. Oh, my God.

>> Mike: Little jousting action.

>> Darin: Even better.

>> Mike: My favorite comment on that was the recommendation to make it a figure eight.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Because you know at some point there's.

>> Darin: Gonna be a figure eight track. Yes.

>> Mike: @ some point it turns into a glue factory if you do that.

>> Darin: We were talking about your job at your party.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Mike works at a glue factory. And when I was a kid, I, envisioned a glue factory with horses going in one door and then glue coming out in bottles out the back.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: And I asked him if that's what happens, and he didn't say no at the time.

>> Mike: I did.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: This is a bite sized episode.

>> Mike: We're coming off of a heavy weekend.

>> Darin: Oh, we're gonna go. We want you to go to.

>> Mike: Are we going?

>> Darin: Yeah. Do you have anything else you want to talk about? I mean, just.

>> Mike: You kind of hit me. Like, you had your little sledgehammer, you.

>> Darin: Had your little taco story and that was fun. Yeah, I liked it. It was great. Thanks.

>> Mike: A little taco story.

>> Darin: Taco story.

>> Mike: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

>> Darin: Guys, we are going to go. We want you to go to irritable dancecenter.com, and download every episode that we have. And more importantly, we want you to go to Instagram or TikTok or the. The Facebook reels. And if you like our videos, share. Share our videos. More people will see them. It'll make us more popular. That's not hard to do, right? It's not gonna kill you to like the video to hit share. huh? Huh? Would it kill you? We'll see you next week on Irritable Dad Central.

>> Mike: Happened.

>> Dave: Irritable dad syndrome is a Mark Goodson Bill Todman production.

>> Mike: You're shaming someone at this point.

>> Darin: No, not at all. I'm happy anyway. You know what? That's something that you do a lot.


Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast

I'll be talking. Yeah. So they found out that the person who shot Kenny was. I'm sorry, Darren. What was that?

>> Mike: That's one of my favorite things to do.

>> Darin: Yeah. Hello, I'm Darren.

>> Mike: Hi, I'm. I am Michael.

>> Darin: Welcome to Irritable Dad Syndrome, Cincinnati's comedy podcast. This is episode 256.

>> Mike: Let's get. Let's. Let's redo that.

>> Darin: Okay. Hi, I'm Darren and Mike. Welcome to Mike M Me Me Mike me. Big and strong.

>> Mike: Me like three Howdy. I'm Mike.

>> Darin: I'm Darren.

>> Mike: No, one more. howdy. howdy.

>> Darin: We're in Texas.

>> Mike: Yeah. Zip it a yay. I'm Mike. Hey, what about J? What do you know? I didn't tell everybody that we're live. I noticed. If we don't do that, no one, it's like people can't follow us. They have to. You're just.

>> Darin: It's like we have to hold everybody's hand.

>> Mike: They're just sitting in front of their computers like plebs, just waiting, no idea what to do. And then I guess a little thing.

>> Darin: Give me a sign.

>> Mike: So and so is like.

>> Darin: That'S exactly how they sound.

>> Mike: This doesn't mess up the rhythm of the show?

>> Darin: No, not at all.

>> Mike: At all.

>> Darin: No. There have been several times where our podcast has come to a just complete halt and we picked it right back up.

>> Mike: Not a problem.

>> Darin: Carried on. You, know what, Mike? You just gotta go with the flow. Like a twig on the shoulder of the mighty stream.

>> Mike: Not a care in the world. No, not a one.

>> Darin: Not me. Who's telling you not to do what? To.

>> Mike: I don't know. I put that down as something I wanted to talk about, but I don't know what, what that means.

>> Darin: Don't do me any favors.

>> Mike: Yeah, I know what that means, but I don't know why I put it here.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: Don't do me no favor.

>> Darin: Don't do me no favors.

>> Mike: Yeah, I guess we're not going to talk about that.

>> Darin: Okay. Oh, that's what's on. the reflection of the O ring is on the tv.

>> Mike: Oh, yeah. That's good.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Mike: That's what you want. I just had a sandwich for dinner, which I was excited about.

>> Darin: What kind of sandwich?

>> Mike: I had like turkey on it.

>> Darin: Okay.

>> Mike: And cheese, mayonnaise. Okay. That's made fun of me because I put pepper on it. Do you put pepper on your sandwiches?

>> Darin: I don't. I cook with pepper, but I don't put pepper on mine.

>> Mike: are you again, pepper on your sandwiches?

>> Darin: No. well, yeah, I am. I like to cook with it, but I don't like to use it as a, condiment. I use it as an ingredient. I will put it.

>> Mike: Isn't. Isn't a condiment an ingredient after the fact?

>> Darin: No.

>> Mike: Yeah.


It looks like we're attracting Jim Norton fans on this show

Welcome to the show.

>> Darin: Hi.

>> Mike: It looks like we're attracting Jim Norton fans.

>> Darin: I know. Stop.

>> Mike: And like, oh, look, dude.

>> Darin: Thought I was Jim Norton.

>> Mike: I think he's looking at me. He might be looking at me. I. I got the. I got the Norton.

>> Darin: I think you and I look as much like Jim Norton as anybody else.

>> Mike: Probably. You know what, if you look cross eyed, it probably it's like one of those magic eye things.

>> Darin: It's like that hamburger that's actually Steve Harvey.

>> Mike: Yeah.

>> Darin: Yeah.

>> Dave: Happy trails to you. Until we meet again.