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Aug. 10, 2021

IDS #50 - She Daffy-Ducked Straight into the Mulch


Billy Idol (and Steve Stevenson) Concert behind a Target!  Also, Mike reports back on his 19th Anniversary extravaganza and gives some advice on marriage!  Mike and Darin have matching weed whackers.  Just let that sit there for a moment.  Darin chaperone's a pool party, and is stopped by the one-way driving patrol.  Darin gets a new office buddy, and talks about white ear hair.  Mr. Mike at Penn Station, and the show ends with the Tale of the Cursing Lady at Church!

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Transcript

00:00:01I've told you several times.

00:00:04You're just you're just sitting there. You were literally sitting that you're in my life to do it like this and it just went and I just messed something up you to call 911 guarantee. Now your your hosts Mike and Darren

00:00:33Hey everybody. I'm there and I'm like welcome to irritable dad Center. This is episode 50 and we have a big show for you boy howdy.

00:00:42Mike is so excited. There's a week, we've got great news about the podcast. We went to see Billy Idol. Mike had a great experience on his anniversary date with his wife. I've got a new office buddy in my, where I work, OK, move somebody in my office with me into your. Okay, yeah, and then we've got a bunch of other things to talk about. So you're going to want to stick around for this week. But first

00:01:06Are podcast irritable Down syndrome was ranked in the top 10% on listen notes. Yes. And so we put a listen to which player on the on the website. So here we are 50 episodes in damn near a year. Yeah and we finally on our website for our podcast, put a link on there to where you can listen to the podcast cuz we're always innovating always always in a video. I mean there was always at a listen now button but apparently looking that is too much work for

00:01:39An actual number of people, we have the data to show that. Once we put the player on their, it increased huge for places on our website to listen. Now you go to the top, just go to the middle. Is it makes me wonder how many people went there looking? I don't know what to do.

00:02:05I do now even by accident. I mean the only thing that we haven't done is like what you had in the old Geo cities. Yeah. Websites from the 90s where you get on there and all the sudden music to start automatically playing like on your Myspace page. I mean, I thought we were going to have to actually go door-to-door and tell people that had to get to the website, how to play the podcast. We should get a Boombox and walk down the street as a podcast. Yes, yes, absolutely. And another big thing that's happened is our last episode or I'm sorry. Episode 48, we can hand out butter that episode. Is it exploded? I don't know why, I don't know either, but it's almost it almost has a hundred downloads. I don't think it's that great of an episodes. I tell you what, tell all your friends about it, tell them all to listen to it and then see if they agree that it sucks.

00:03:0515. Ya episode 2. Wow.

00:03:10I went back and look at episode 2 because for some reason somebody downloaded that this past week and may they rest in peace portal never no. Never listen to another one of our shows. Again we're begging you. If you like this podcast, we're encouraging you to tell all your friends to go to irritable Down syndrome. Go back into the 30s, there's no attachment up. Start listing from their. Don't start it and there's no reason to start. It. Number one, or like, like, this isn't sequential here, like you said, this A Game of Thrones. Yeah, you don't turn on the news. The 24-hour News Channel say, well, I need to start back in 1982, ketchup. Not all you just start watching it.

00:03:47Wolf Blitzer. Looks the same now as he did back in 82 in it with us now. Go back to the number for. Here's a thought the damn show notes and if you see something in the show notes, that works your fancy work shirt week. Sure. That jumps coin

00:04:11I'm going to do everything in my power, that makes better thing jumps. Turquoise shirt idea, Mike and I went to see Billy Idol in concert. We went up to William Idol. William broad as his born name, that he chose the name Billy Idol when he joined Generation X, he was in a punk band back in the 70s. And then in the 80s, if you're, if you're in your upper forties, or fifties, you remember Billy Idol, is he weird ginormous. Hindi 80s, couldn't go anywhere without hearing Eyes Without a Face for Fantasy City. Dancing with Myself, you probably took vacuum hoses and wrap them around yourself with fire around. You act like your chest. Exactly. That's but it was a, it was a great concert Mike. And I went up to Huber Heights, it's near Dayton Ohio. And if you never been to Dayton, don't just

00:05:11Drive past it. Go drive in Ohio until you don't see anything interesting. Any more. That's dating your. In Dayton New Year, there are a lot of people who live and work in the great David Chappelle are there? No, not really. Okay, right now. Well perceive and a yapper seem and it got, he was, he was the voice of the dog clippers. Yeah, yeah. The 1973 Clippers.

00:05:50And there when they appeared on Scooby-Doo Percy made, they couldn't get all the Clippers to know they couldn't avoid. So they got first team and a he did all the way he did. All the voices it was kind of weird because you can kind of tell that it was the same guy and he did some ways. It's like they have every every show in the seventies and eighties had some character that had a voice that was Percy mandate is first room and ate his friend called him, the Purser. See

00:06:24What happened? So we get to the Billy Idol show. Let me see. We were on our way to the Bolero show and we thought we'd been duped the GPS. Yeah, the GPS is taking us and I've told several GPS stories on this podcast before I thought we were going to have another one of those experiences cuz we're driving and the GPS tells us to take a left and we took a left and we passed up at Target and like a Jo-Ann Fabrics or something. We're going down this, a one-lane road and there's like a storage unit right now being like the opening of an Unsolved Mysteries. And next thing, you know it's a really nice giant outdoor facility for those of you near or around Cincinnati. It was basically Riverbend

00:07:24Then it was behind Target where it was like the PNC Pavilion you go to Huber Heights. You goes behind the target left at the dumpster and there's this amazing Amphitheater out there in the middle of nowhere. There was a old lady who got mad at me when I tried to park. She has received them manded.

00:07:44See, when you come to a place like that and it's just like Riverbend. Do you know the closer you are to the venue? I know you're at 4 every car, space closer, you are. That's another hour that you're waiting to get out and out of 15 drunk people, you're going to meet that you don't want to meet. I wanted to park closer to the back. They insisted that I pull up and she had that Top Gun. You like those things that the guy uses the guide, the Jacks that thing. And she was demant like At first, she was gently gesturing toward slipspace that you need to go to. And by the end of it, she was swinging that thing like Conan. I thought she was going to use the climate across the hectorol. So, of course, immediately, when we got out the car, I swear Darin under the bus. I told her, I have been trying to get him to park in that space But you know these bulb holes. Wow. Under one of them, I am so we park. Yeah. You know we couldn't just park, we had to park with a little bit of level of confusion and excitement we get inside the

00:08:44Place. It's a really nice place. We find our seats and might like

00:08:50Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like, you're welcoming everybody into the neighborhood because we were both wearing our shirts Mike and I decided where are irritable? Dad syndrome t-shirts to the concert and helping someone say, hey, what's that? And then we would tell them downloads. While we were people, accidentally look at it but the beer lady was like, what's what words do I need to learn some lady? I put on my humor into the shirt. I know it's not there's no more left. I don't know why you promoted because people ask you about it and, you know, I don't know. I don't know. I know, I text like that. One guy. I just wore the shirts to do something about you wearing the same shorts that I did on top of the shirt, really made us look. So Mike and I knew we were going to wear the same people. Dancing to t shirt. I wore camouflage shorts. Mike is also wearing Army for

00:09:50Shorts. So, we look extra matchie. We're both wearing matching shorts. Yeah, we get into the place. We find our seats and we start chatting it up with these. I was proud of you guys. They were talking about Billy Idol and and they kept calling the guitarist Steve Stevenson, we're really excited to see Steve Stevenson, does Billy have the same drummer? Because there was one concert where he hit the drums with the, the, the sticks sticks.

00:10:37Who's awesome. It's okay. Pretty good because this guy can't remember the word sticks. It's okay. If you don't know, the drums are played with drumsticks. But if you're that inept, got to start a conversation about drums. With somebody, I don't walk up and people start talking about nuclear physics,

00:11:08I don't even know enough to finish the job. I don't either. I don't need it. I've never seen a merch line this long. And it was no offense to mr. Idol, there wasn't, that much merch there. No. But I think it's because there was one merch place. I thought about that on the way home. Usually, when you go to a concert, there's multiple areas. When there was one and it was sneaking through the whole outside. Area's hurt to breathe back in the arena. Yeah, cuz I thought, you know, whenever he plays his hit, whatever, Hang on Sloopy, or whatever, they're taking money, out of the Foxy's started playing. This is a perfect perfect opportunity to go check out the merch cuz I I listen to one or two in her song, I got that they're pretty good. So I I went out I'm like, I can hear them. I can tell when they go off stage and that ended up working out pretty well, with the exception of the fact, that the guy ran out of the fat sizes by the

00:12:08When I got up there and I ended up having to get a large wear and I normally buy an extra large, right? So Mike from the 90s and early 2000 can wear a large Mike. Now, Kate Bridal diet, I need the diet to what was cool. Was a couple things happened in the Birch line. We saw a guy in his drunk, girlfriend wife, who are alcohol, I had to have been either with me or something. I don't know what that is. Straight to save her life. Yeah. And at one point she was using their foot, did you see that she was? Yeah, she's Barefoot. She's holding her nachos, and then she,

00:12:52She Daffy Duck into the molds nachos, flu 3, ft in the air, all the lead singer of the the bodies walkthrough. She came out. Of course I abandoned air and then right over there and got a selfie and you like your face is in there. I was like, I'm so Mike met the lead singer of the Foxy's and we posted that picture on, on our Instagram or Twitter if you have Brenda foxy, maybe Clarice reminds me of a young, Debbie Harry. I don't know who Debbie Harry a c. But okay,

00:13:37Did I just say the whole Band came out and then I didn't handle so special. I'm like, well, but I did get a selfie with just releasing her so it was she wasn't. Yeah, Billy Idol. All these years later still a badass. It bothered me that when he took his shirt off, he as what is he 6065? It looks better than I do just like he did when he was 35 without a shirt. That also pissed me off. I did not know that. That was the guy that Steve Stevenson Steve Steve Stevens. I didn't know, I've been a huge fan of the Top Gun album forever. I have it on the vittles, write down here and and I know it like I E just randomly started playing that injuring his solo. He started playing part of the Top Gun Anthem and I recognized but that's not him on that on the album, is it? Yeah, okay yeah I think it is. I mean Fancher said it was he would know

00:14:37Stephenson also did a bunch of Led Zeppelin song strings guitar solo. Yeah, he did, but that came in out of the blue and I was just like, okay, you're doing the guy that's kind of cool. But a little respect please that's what I was thinking in my head and then Fancher posted the thing that a that's the guy that did not. So the whole time I'm sitting there being all like, holier-than-thou, why don't you have some respect, right? I was like, you forgot. He was the guy that did it. That was like, the only two things I can really say critical of the concert was Steven Stevenson. He is, he is Steve Stevenson, is the guy that did the Top Gun Harold faltermeyer

00:15:21Steve said, that lady with that, that thing that brings the aircraft in. They're bringing in Flames while he's playing that. That would have been perfect time. I've seen Billy Island concert first time, I went was The Charmed Life to her and Steve Stevens or Steve Stevenson, was it with him there? He he they split up receiver according to talk me out of it said, yes. Okay. I don't know why and I don't know why they got back together but they did. So he wasn't with them on that tour. The other three tours that I saw, Steve Stevenson did the same guitar solo like every time. So he's been doing my buddy, Eric cross. Who was at the show? Has seen him two other times.

00:16:21Doing this guitar solo for like the past 20 years, stream, Lee talented, get to guitarist.

00:16:28Give us another guitar stuff and then the only other critical thing I could say was, you know, Billy Idol did a cover of some song by the Jamie's or I don't know unless it was l a woman or a man, you could have given us John Wayne or hot in the city, another one of your hits but you know what? I had a great time Billy Idol was still amazed. I really would have liked something from just the frame to acknowledge it to the system, but you not playing there. You know, a song that you like when we saw when I saw Page and Plant with box and Furniture in the guys, they were refusing the entire tour to play Stairway to Heaven. They flat-out said, in interviews, we will not play that song on this morning.

00:17:17This is such a deeply where and when the Levee Breaks would get what I wanted to see. But anyway, but yeah, they were like, we're not going to play that song.

00:17:25Play way in honor of Billy Idol. Okay, we had our announcer. Dave, late, mr. David Lee, who is also a big fan of of Billy Idol. And Dave has recorded himself, reading lyrics to Billy Idol songs and tonight, the world premiere of Dave doing Eyes Without a Face. When you hear the music, you make a dip. It is someone else's pocket. Then Mega slip, Steelix good. Las Vegas, the gigolo pool hanging by the state line, turning holy water into wine, drinking it down. Oh oh oh I'm on a bus. On a psychedelic trip. Reading murder books. Trying to stay up. I'm thinking of you, you're out there. So say your prayers.

00:18:13Thank you. Dave listeners will remember. Last episode we were talking about anniversary and how I spent my anniversary in our basement with you. But we had agreed and that's not agree that we were going to celebrate that following weekend. So we did so best set up the dinner. Reservations either a nice restaurant. Where did you go? We went to lisanti's, lisanti's, your wife to McDonald's, the McDonald's, the McDonald's or Wendy's. Go to White Castle to take Obel on an anniversary. So she gets reservations at lisanti's. We're excited. We're going to go there. What she didn't do was recognized, that lasante says right there at the FC. Stadium, area, c, c, f c, c.

00:19:13Cincinnati Cincinnati soccer or as the English people call it footballs footballs and there was a game, haha plus an outdoor event. It was a match a match. Please send out door and it's not in there and it's football. American football been going on until we got within a mile of the restaurant and we started seeing people walking with FC, you know, jerseys or t-shirts or whatever they are, you know? So it becomes clear when I can find a parking space anywhere near. So we are late and we're almost out of gas. I will another factor in the story, but we knew we were almost out of gas. When we left just like screw it. We're going to get there. I'll drop you off. You run in there. Make sure there is Victor. They had a 5 minute, grace. Usually, whenever we make, reservations to places where late

00:20:12And we just like, we're going to be there in about 10 minutes, this place we called, and the guy said you'd be here within five minutes and it'll be here for you seriously and you give him that you're on your way. So she didn't press the fact that we may be late, she just said we have a reservation at 5 or whatever it was and we may be a few minutes late and he said your you would be within the 5 minute grace. And something about the tone of his voice. Stopped further information coming from her face run out of gas. Drop her off and I'm like I'm going to go find a space. I circle around the circle gets wider and wider and longer and longer until like 3 or 4 blocks out. And like I'm about to run out of literally about to run out of gas. I'll check on the GPS, there's a gas station, 7 minutes away.

00:21:09She's now been in there for about 10 minutes but I text her, I got to go get gas. I went the wrong direction to get gas at one point. They were just people just standing out in the road, right, I get up there, I get to the gas station. Now, our gas tank is on the left side of our car and it's booked by the pastor's that the driver side driver side. There's this at 3 Pump Station, I can't go around the other way to get to the the gas pump. That's farther away from me. A car pulls up right in front of me to go into one of the two places that I can go, all they have to do is move up to the next space, right? And they can get gas and I can get gas, they pull up that front space and they stop. And they get out, they stop and they pause. And they stare at me, you can see their eyes

00:22:09Meet. They register. If you just move up and get gas then they just turn right? Put their card and a thing and start getting their gas. You know, that I start text. I start doing what I normally do in situations. I start texting my rage to the Past like some whatever pulled into the gas station. And every this is what the a very popular gas station in West Chester like 16 Palms. All of them, all of them. Want open up in the same time, it opened up another one dead and I pull up to the first one and the other one is open up. I could have pulled all the way through didn't and I didn't actually got out of his car and walked over and said, why didn't you just pull out yet? And I said, I could have swore. I really did. I thought someone was pulling in here. I thought someone was coming in to pull in four words.

00:23:09I thought that guy was coming and I'm sorry, he goes, okay, we're going to have any confrontation. I always afraid that I had something would happen to me yet. She was, you makes me or something? I don't know. So, I just sat there and I waited, she finally pulled forward. I made a point to pull forward, like followed her all the way through and would move up to the space. She should have taken and got close enough to her to, where she would have to look in the rearview mirror and see me pulling up to the space. You should have been that's my passive-aggressive way of making that point. I hope she feels bad. She's now been sitting at the at the restaurant for 15 minutes to drink. She's ordered an appetizer and I am a salad at this point. I am still at least 7 minutes away from even getting back to where she is and that's it. That's if you find a place to park. So I get back to within two blocks of where she is.

00:24:10Traffic. Slowed way down there. People walking all over the place I pull into a lot that is offering spaces for $20. I'm getting desperate there. I'm I am in front. I can see the restaurant but I have to turn left and there is a line of cars coming as far as the eye can see and it's one of those things of where the turning green and that's yellow and nobody can go. I sat through that light three times finally on the 4th one there was a space in between the cars. It was red as the day is long. Turn left on red in front of everybody. I think someone honked, I think I was called an expletive. I just I went on my way and I drove toward the city and I'm like I'm going to go until I see some place to park about five to six blocks away. By the way, best has been in the restaurant now for about 2,

00:25:1025 minutes. Okay I'm about six blocks away. I see a Veterinary Hospital that for some reason is right next to a pay parking lot that for some reason has one space open right on the street old in there, then I'm messing with the card machine, it won't work and won't take my card.

00:25:33Beth has now been in the restaurant for 30 minutes again I did but I texted her, I found a space and I get a back. So I do all the stuff that I need to do. Now I begin my six-block, walk back to the restaurant, past the festival. That's go to football, physical soccer past all these things. But yeah, so they don't use their hands to kick the ball.

00:25:58Just slightly just enough just enough to piss you off, but not really get you wet. You know what I mean? That kind of drizzle God watches over. He's like, and I start hearing all this yelling at him and like tone Loke or something, like Wild Thing, wearing something like that. And I look, and there's one of these stupid pedal buses. If you seen those, they get drunk people, haha. And they all have little pedal things and the bus is is like a bike and they're peddling this thing and it's got like tone Loke and Young MC. I don't know. The guy that was guiding it. The tour guide looked like he wanted to be anywhere else.

00:26:48It was all these people. It was the Titanic at a whole bunch of drunk. It will take me to the McDonald's. It was it was the kind of people that wear visors, some of it and Sons and they just going up the street. So now, it's raining on me. Huh. It's 35 minutes now that she's been alone by the way. Our 19th anniversary. Yes. She's already eating the appetizer. She's on her second drink.

00:27:15Some guys hitting on her. I've just been through a very, I've been through a very unwelcoming area and it made it back and I finally get in there, haha, and yay.

00:27:35Where's the bathroom? I got to piss. I didn't say that but I did go to the bathroom and then came back and we had a wonderful dinner. I'm going to be paying that dinner off for the next 3 to 4 months cuz I got the bill and I'm like holy Lord. Yeah. But the cool thing about the bill is that they put it in a book. Oh yeah. Like a hardback book, haha. And we open that up to get the bill out. We noticed that people were signing, think so, what did I put in their irritable Down syndrome.

00:28:14Here about 1. So if you came to this show what's on tease by seeing this website written in a book in the sun face, welcome first.

00:28:27Thank you for spending that much money on steak just to finally get to the show that once it gets up to the three-digit range. Yeah it starts to get my attention like really get my attention that's for two people to play this week when the tip becomes an expensive meal at another place. Yes that's when it's like okay there's a there's a Jeff Ruby's downtown do you okay it was very similar to that and we had never been and so Libby decided she surprised me is how we're going to go out and whatever time she says we've never went. We're going to splurge and so we went to Jeff Ruby's and it was good. Good meal.

00:29:27Colors. Good. Let's sew.

00:29:32I talked to you about how I've been learning how to grill better. So I paid special attention to the steak. I got just this past week, we got some steaks at the Kroger Kroger mention for the week. I got some blue cheese, the same thing that I've gotten at the place. I got it, got it pretty close and that cost me about 14 Bucks versus what I paid, which is about a semester, maybe half a semester for my kids college.

00:30:09Well, happy anniversary. Thank you. I'm glad you had a. Did you have fun? It's, it's very important to have, like a date and have time with your spouse away from. Yeah, those damn kids, and I say that with love, I love my kids, I love. Mikey need, you need a love thing. I love time. You need alone time with work. Otherwise you're going to be one of these couples that ends up the kids leave. And you're just sitting there. And then you say, you are you looking at me, you don't want that.

00:30:43Why don't you pass a stone? You saw them. You know, it's you don't want to be one of those I've met so many people. This is Jacob's going to be leaving the house in a couple years when Cameron goes. Well, you could talk to me, you know, each other to have fun and we still have fun together. We crack each other up. If you, if you have a relationship, if your relationship with your wife or if you with your husband. Yeah, I think everybody listen to show that is in the middle, is a middle-aged fat bald white guy? Like we are probably, I'm sure they come from all walks of life to the show.

00:31:32But if you send us a picture of you, if you're if you're not fat like a nice litmus test for from Uncle Mike, if you still got kids in the house and you and your your wife or your husband, find that you will share a joke or you'll start to you'll be talking about something that you think it's hilarious and you have to shut up when the kids come in and you get annoyed and you wait for them to leave so you can finish the joke. That's that, that tells you that you're in a good place, that's a little like a little test. If you're in that same situation and you're like all, thank God, they're here. That's a bad sign.

00:32:20It's a bad sign.

00:32:23Has this ever happened to you? You're you're telling your wife a story. OK. Google. But it's just something that you don't need the kid to know about whether it's a surprise. They got coming down the road or whether you know, someone who's not feeling well or whether you're talking about somebody that you know, that you're going to see a couple weeks from now and I don't want them repeating that store in front of it. So the kid walks in the room and then you and then I'll tell you later what's going on? You can tell you can tell him I don't want to tell you right now. She's busy right now. I don't want to tell you right now. I could tell you that. I'll tell you that this may shock you

00:33:19But whenever whenever best is telling me something like that, in the kids walk in, I relish those moments cuz I'm like, what is it best? What did they say?

00:33:29The whole time. Yeah. Holy Lord, the stamina.

00:33:36Wheatland. That's what she said. Is that is one of our favorite things to do but that's so. So we got into the pattern of sand. You know, this is what you need to quit saying, that's what she said, the kids are going to hear you. They're going to ask what that is and when was it started, that's what was said. So she knows what I'm talking about that she gets over there, but Andrew has seen some clips of the Office on YouTube. So he started to giggle a little bit as I got. Okay, bottle here.

00:34:15I don't know where the men bottle is.

00:34:20That ain't what I thought was the worst. What was when the kids are really little? And they like they wanted to get ice cream. We as a buddy that's place is closed at Kings Island closed, Florida. Close. Sorry we, we can't go with clothes and they're smart enough to know. Now that Mom and Dad, you're full of crap that it's not closed.

00:34:46I've yeah I can't use the I'm going to call Santa and cancel. Christmas is a few. I did that was the best I love calling Santa. Oh yeah, I would say yeah with Charlie multiple times, buddy. I'm sorry you're saying there. Yeah, I've got honey, I've got Harvey the elf. He's going to get Santa Harvey's kind of slow. I want Santa maybe right now. Maybe Charlie can get his act together before Harvey and his slow ass gets over to Santa this portion of irritable bowel syndrome. Has brought you by OB footlong hot dogs, had a crazy day are the kids driving you nuts, and the boss is climbing on your ass waiting for you to work late again. I'm Dave way and I know the feeling it seems like life is constantly trying to rip me a new one and this always happens on my night to make dinner. So what do I do? I'll tell you Sally I throw some Whoppers Aldi, footlong hot dogs on the grill and just like that.

00:35:46Everybody's happy. Whoppers are made from pure beef with no fillers or preservatives. They're packed full of flavor and they're perfect for any meal or a late-night snack. Get a ruler and measure it yourself. If you are hot, dog isn't a footlong, they'll refund your money guarantee. So, after this podcast is over, run out and grab a package of Whoppers, all beef, footlong hot dogs, you'll be glad you did.

00:36:10I'm going to take a picture of of me and Mike said that I forgot to mention earlier and I wore matching t-shirts to the to the Billy Idol concert were also wearing matching t-shirts. Now in Mike's, wearing his Johnny Cash shirt. I'm wearing, my Johnny Cash Hurt and we also have matching weed wackers. We did it which has nothing to do with anything and we bought them at the same time.

00:36:32What is that? I am just thinking the odds of that of me, buying lawn equipment at all on any given day, is astronomical hope to be there at the same time, you are. And by the same lot of a weed wacker, cuz I had one and I had a weed wacker and a, a blower bought. The combination weed wacker blower in the same box and I like good deal who I want that. Yeah, and so you told me where it was and I went I got it was a good weed. Whackers in Bloomer battery, you put the battery in it. You don't have to use extension cords and it comes in a green box out of the pantry with gasoline in a thing. You know that kerosene in 40 minutes to get your own the timer to. Yeah I'm going to Target to get a thing. Why did it take you 7 minutes to get the turn down the pot.

00:37:32exhausted, but we should probably get tested, we should

00:37:48She's going to be somebody out there. One of our listeners Works in scanning mental health. You'll see doctors on the YouTubes on TV saying we've mapped where you smell dog farts in. What is this dog is going to park next to this guy? Give this part of the brain on. This can glows yellow, when he smells the part, there's got to be some map of our brains. That's cuz that's a. Normal matching, Johnny Cash t-shirts at the same time. It's not it's not incredibly weird but the lawn equipment is pretty weird. Yeah, it if it was anyone else it would suggest a surveillance, it would suggest like I think he's going to buy weed wacker, I weed wacker, if you're double dead syndrome has brought you by death liquid. Concentrated wallpaper stripper with its unique enzyme action. This dissolves old paste and guts wallpaper removal. Time-and-a-half, this is Dave Lay,

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00:39:21So I mentioned several times that my oldest son, Jacob is in marching band. Yes. So last year, Libby decided she was going to volunteer. She was going to help out. She was going to be a band Mom, and she went and did a bunch of stuff and helped out with the band. She hung up costumes and, and Jell-O molds looks just like a yellow. So, this year, I thought, okay, I need to step up and help out some. So the marching band had a pool party. Okay? I decided that I was going to help, and I was going to chaperone the pool party. Are those of you who are not in America, a pool party is where you have a pool. Yes. And then you have a party. Yes, thank you, Mike. The whole marching band. They rented out the Mason Community Center. Mason, Ohio is a very, very nice parts.

00:40:21Of the area and the community center for Kings Island is gorgeous at this place is really nice. It has huge water slides. There's not a lazy flipping River in the middle of it. Okay, it's a giant pool with the Lazy River in it and a bunch of and it's awesome. We're driving to the community center and get to the building where GPS said to go. Jacob gets out walks up to the door, and there's other kids, they can't open the door, kind of like this, can't be right? And so somebody says, oh no, no, no, the Mason Community Center, it's over there. The pools over there, and they're pointing ecstatically to another area. So, Jacob starts walking though. So it's a walkable areas. Got like some other students and I got the keys and I drove over there. Okay. And I'm following these other appearances may take a left. Go left a hanger, right? And then I'm, I'm following Victor through part of a parking lot. I cut through the same part of the parking lot.

00:41:19There's a red Corvette. Convertible that's pulling up driving toward me and the guy is pointing the other way. He's pointing and pointing in pointing, okay? And I'm thinking, how does he know where you're going? Nowhere, I'm thinking he's a parent also cuz there's there's like five of us parents in a convoy trying to get to the pool. He's pointing the other direction until I stopped. And he said, you're going the wrong way. And I said, oh, I'm following this is what we're just making go into the pool, he goes, no, this is one way you're going the wrong. Way on a one-way area, that's one way police there apparently. And I said, oh, I'm sorry. He goes, oh, don't be sorry. Just don't be an idiot.

00:42:13Old pulls out just leaves before I could make my comeback still worse and my comeback was going to be. Oh yeah.

00:42:29You're an idiot. Nice, not nice. There's nobody else in this particular part of the parking lot and this is like here I go again, pissing people off. I just love to do that jackass pool. Jacob goes in and it's a me and there's like five or six other parents. And this is what chaperoning is like. We stood there and did nothing here. We just ordered. We had our arms crossed like I got my eye on you and occasionally, I would, I would make a lap around the pool. And look at students, like no jumping don't, run no peeing in the pool until like the very end. It was 11 time for me to go. And I said,

00:43:29It's time to go, right? I'm walking around. I'm trying to. Hey guys, what's up? Let's go to stuff. We wrap it up. Let's wrap it up with another kid with the towel and I said, hey, okay, and he stops, he just looks like, okay, so I think I could be a professional chaperone. Nobody was around over. There were no fights, nobody brought in any illegal. Contraband. Okay, yeah, there was no no hanky-panky, a note, I know, grab-ass nothing. Everything. Everything went great, everything went absolutely great yet. Did you do a do a head count? Was? They walk down. And make sure they all came out, but there was somebody there. Somebody watching the front door to make sure nobody left where they use in the buddy system. Do flutes are trombones that in the water there.

00:44:29Guards stationed at the river there. Any kids that just hung out in the lazy river and didn't get in the regular pull? It was part of the pool, that's like a whirlpool. And they're like 40 kids in it. Just going around around the most fun part of the night was. So the party is from 8 to 11 around 9:30 and was started getting dark. All the lights in the pool with Don, and every suit with

00:45:07Fireworks show. They lost their minds because the lights went on. Well that's a very Spidey out on this portion of irritable. Dead Syndrome has brought you buy Cola. There's nothing more refreshing than a nice cold bottle of crank. That's right. Crank, Cola isn't available in a, can the fine folks at crank refused to sell their soda in anything, but a glass bottle just like God intended, it's available in cherry vanilla and now their newest flavor Peach to grab a bottle of crank today, the old fashioned soda that comes in a bottle and stays busy longer. Now, back to the show,

00:45:46I now have a new person in my office. Now, this is odd. So I can you describe to me? How large is your office when you get out of a mental, I've got a decent sized. Okay, the room that I'm in used to have three islands and four, people could sit at the island. Okay, what they did. Since I make commercials part of the area and editing station in the area has a couch and two chairs, and a table with a client Lounge. So editing station and then the other part is where clients can come in and we can brainstorm, we talk about what their it's nice. And when I moved in this particular part of the building, I said, guys, this is this is big. I don't need this much space, you're going in there. There's another part of the building where there's an office, a smaller office, they're going to take over that to bring in some people to Archive

00:46:46A lot of footage and it's going to take a very long time. So the person who's in that office, they're moving her out and they moved her into my room with me. Okay, I'm not used to having an office buddy. Yeah, I've just not used to having somebody else. They're not, she's very nice. I've always gotten along with her, but I'm just not used to her being there. Your love two pieces of private things. You, if you want to picture, you can bring in. Like one picture. You can have off if no flowers. I don't want any any perfumes do be do be do private, phone call again. No, personal. Fuck is loving and look at the thing about it is you stop it with the heavy breathing over there and just can you breathe through your nose or your? She doesn't know who Weezer is. She's never watched.

00:47:46Never watch Breaking Bad. What we have. Nothing to talk about it to hell and Ice perfect off. Everybody's somebody you don't have anything in common with every day. Oh my God. The Granny Smith is it really is like the ones on V that rip their face off into the lizard under their. So this is my space and they moved her into it, okay? And they stop and ask her. So how you doing being in here with Darren? Nobody asked how you doing with this new person in your room. White and just bring some duct tape in and run. Some duct tape down a line and split the office.

00:48:28This is yours. I think I might have put Christmas wrapping all over her. Dad move her desk into the bathroom.

00:48:42She asked me, this is. So what are you doing? I got like, like, plans later tonight. Like what? We're putting the bypass? So what do you talk about? Well, I'm going to talk about you. I pick on her. She's very nice. She is she really is very nice.

00:49:00But I'm not used to having something else in the room, you know. And I talked about this before with her being there. I kind of feel like, should we be having a conversation? Because if we go too long, just doing our work, would you spell weird? But if I'm working, then I should be talking to her when she's fine to start all kinds of uncomfortable conversations. You could you could just start saying that. I tell you my toe is infected.

00:49:35Is it laundry day today?

00:49:39I've been such a jerk to her.

00:49:43So Mike, what's your least? Favorite part of growing old. You're only 46 right now? Yeah. Okay I'm 51 OK. Google past year or so hold on. You ask me a question. My least favorite part of getting older getting fat and unable to unfat it metabolizes and goes down. So you have to work harder. Yeah. But then you're also getting older and you think I deserve to eat 3 ice cream sandwiches at once? I've made it this far, like, like Anna sitting or at a time, like, you stack of one on top of the other unhinge your jaw and then he threw it at all. I hadn't thought of doing that. But now I will, you can do two side-by-side. We mention our previous podcast that I I overeat now because I know it's some point of doctor's going to tell me I need to cut back on this, cut back on that, right? So I feel it's my duty. Well I can just go for it, sit down and eat a whole pint.

00:50:36Something Jenny's chunky monkey chunky monkey whatever over the past year. Or so, I've noticed that I'm getting hair growing out of my ear, and I can't stand it, cuz it's disgusting. And one of those oir, trimmer things I do, but the tweezers I have, I have, I have to tweeze it. Absolutely crazy. And I'm all the time thinking of people see hair growing out of my ear. Yeah, right. Cuz I told you like with my eyebrows. I hate when my eyebrows get bushy, and I run the trimmers over my eyebrows. Yeah. Cuz I don't want to be Martin Scorsese or that guy from Dune, but the white hair growing out of your drives. Me. Absolutely crazy. And I'm not asking I can't pluck out of my ear. I'm not asking the wife to pluck the hair out of my know, our relationship is not there, they like to do stuff like that. It's weird here. Let me get that. No, let that be where it is. Let me get that.

00:51:35Reminder 8 cuz I tried that one feels like it's coming from where it shouldn't ride feels like I know it's not growing out of my eardrum right? But I'm afraid I'm going to go and then I just won't hear out of my right ear and it more for the rest of my life. You're afraid you're going to pull out your ear by ear.

00:52:01A little message. Will come out saying old and I can't hear anymore.

00:52:06I've also got to the age for my toenails. Start driving me crazy. If they get past a certain length.

00:52:16Get up the other night and cut my damn toe nails in the morning, cuz they were driving me crazy. They have a normal shape anymore of those weird. Do my toenails have never had a normal shape around mine used to and then somewhere around 40-ish they just decided hey we're going to let you know there's old pictures of the you know that you remember the Guinness Book of World Records, yesterday would have the repairs. That guy that weird guy and you like how did he even wipe his butt? He didn't know. Those begins to look like those and I don't know what that is. Why is it do that? I don't know.

00:52:55It's now time for an important Public Service Announcement. If you have trouble reading seeing road signs, or recognizing faces. When people are talking to you, you should consider getting a pair of glasses. And I can't see without my glasses. I've worn glasses for years, they're comfortable, and the ladies think they make me look sexy as hell. Most importantly, they helped me see things. And without them, I'm about as useless as the tracking button on a VCR. So what are you waiting for? Get a pair of glasses and start seeing stuff today? Now, back to our show,

00:53:31I had a fun commercial shoot the other day, I was mentioned several times. I work at a TV station and last week, I told you that I was going to be working with the guy who's also named Aaron. Just smells it Darrin, okay. This guy could not be more cool if he possibly tried. I mean he was fun and cool and I was talking to him. I'm like so do people have a problem saying, spelling pronouncing your name, but he just goes all of you wouldn't believe them. Likely, I would

00:54:01Hollywood and he said, almost Verbatim what I said, he's, as I get Derrick Darryl and Damon all the time, even an m in their know. And I said, have you ever got darphin? But he get, he gets Daryl and Derrick all the time. No one can spell it. And we were just having this great conversation like, oh my God, you just like me, nobody knows your name station. I had a pickup order, okay, every time I get a pickup order, if it doesn't matter, Chick-fil-A or wherever? Yeah, Mike, I told him. My name is Mike, okay. So I went into Penn Station the other day to get my order and the guy said his name acid. Mike, how's it going mr. Mike and he reminded me of Tracy Tracy Morgan.

00:55:01She was picking up a sandwich.

00:55:06Okay, I'll be right out. You start to wonder what the hell's going on. Are you being set up for something?

00:55:17Warning. This portion of our show contains delicate subject matter. Parental Guidance is suggested.

00:55:23I want to ask you about a story that I see on here because we do a rundown and we will bring it talk about and then we always have a section. If we have time. I think we have some time to make time for this one. OK. Corral sing lady at church.

00:55:40This sounds like a gym. Okay. We have to get quacker the duck, Akshay. Ready for this, okay? Because cursing lady at church is exactly what it is. Is the volunteer at our church, and there was this particular day where we had to get there an hour or so early. Okay, I had the kids out at the playground and Libby was inside our church doing volunteer stuff. So I'm watching the kids making sure that nobody falls off the swings and cracks their face open doing what dads do. Go to watch yourself, get up and then I hear this lady.

00:56:21And she's it in the background music. No, no, no, hell no, get your goddamn hands off me. Nope. No, you know, I am not going in there. You can't drink, get your hands off me. No, no nothing. Nothing normal language. One expects that a tramp in American lady. She is dressed to the nines. She is she looks fantastic. Okay. Okay, she's got her hat. She's got her, her lovely dress and from what? I gather, somebody had their hands. Somebody know. Okay. I think she was at a home and someone the, I believe it was the driver cuz someone would go from place to place and pick people up and take them on errands and doctor appointments. This particular gentleman was taking her to church and he was trying to walk her into church.

00:57:21And she would not go. I hope he was cussing up a storm. Okay, no there's no, I'm not going in there. You can't make me stop it, stop it. No, she didn't want to go to church but she did not want him to take her into church. I had to call Libby and I said we have a situation out here. I said we've got a lady screaming obscenities and we have a guy who is pretty much just lost his will to keep trying still cursing a Blue Streak. And I said, Jacob wanted to take Cameron to do so the playground and he looks, IT cameras Cameron. I think this lady is special needs. So, the police came Nowell two police officers and they came and took two of them. Took to calm her down to get to really know to say that they make her, get her ass in the church.

00:58:21I kept asking her what was a problem and what can we do to help? And Angie to see, he is trying to take me there and I'm not going in there, okay?

00:58:35That's okay. And I don't like the way they

00:58:45Bless your heart. Okay as well. Finally got her calm down and the guy who picked her up and was bring her to church. Was able to take her back. Okay, okay.

00:58:58Okay. Hopefully they took her through a drive-through or something. It's been a fun when we appreciate you listening. We hope you come back next week and we definitely want you to come back the week after that, cuz that is going to be our one year anniversary special. And one of these days we're going to do that special. Yes. But in the meantime, go to airville Dad Syndrome., again, there's a player on the site so there's one less quick to get to the actual episode. There's also a few Clips up there, some pictures, there's a link to our patreon page so we don't say no help support this. If this does cost money it does, and every little bit helps bless you. Also get access to bonus content and different things. One of my favorite things is the voting on the episode titles. Yes, because we have to up our game. We usually come up with just random titles and then me and Darren just decide what going to call it. Now we've got like four or five titles each time.

00:59:58Picture on at a certain level and above, they get to the vote on the titles and episode was the opposed to be called ice cream. Be delicious. But no, they are our friends decided. It's going to be, you don't screw with lasagna. Here's the thing. When we edit, we usually upload the episode early. It's usually up there like, Sunday or Monday, but it's an inaccessible until Tuesday morning, and we give it a title that we think it should have, and then we let people vote a lot of times, the voting goes the way that we thought it should be. This is one of those where it didn't. It did not like it used to be. I screamed at four to five titles in there and be okay with anyone. If that's right. That's what we do with lasagna if I didn't like it. That's right. But hey,

01:00:58I can Randy Gojira and then we're going to be at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. If you are in the Greater Cleveland area, come by, we would love to see you were having to take pictures will sign autographs. And you can tell us some stories and then we will relay them on this podcast or not. Thanks for listening will see you next time. This has been irritable. Dead syndrome mention you heard this podcast and will send you the next episode free. Thanks for listening and drive safely.

01:01:30If I looked all over the world and there's every type of girl that you are empty, I seem to pass me by leave me dancing with myself. So let's sink another drink cuz it'll give me time to think. If I had the chance I would ask the world to dance and I'd be Dancing with Myself.